Borderline Personality Disorder

People with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) are sensitive and intelligent. In fact, they are so sensitive that it would hurt them tremendously if they felt they had done wrong. Being incapable of feeling that they have done wrong, they project their inner demons onto one or more intimate others, and intermittently torture those others.

Luckily, most of you have never had a Borderline in your life. If you have never been close to a Borderline, you may have difficulty believing what they can do. Though psychiatric diagnoses are never perfect, the behaviors generally ascribed to Borderlines include:

  • They manifest as Dr. Jekyll or My Hyde, being your best friend/lover, or your worst enemy. On their good side they are amazing partners, enticing Sirens.
  • They are prone to intermittent rages, triggered by either something trivial, or nothing at all, which are so extreme, that during a rage the Borderline is capable of almost any violence.
  • They distort reality (called Gaslighting) in order project an image of being a good person and a victim. They want you (the other) to appear the villain. They will accuse you of doing or saying things you never did or said, and otherwise distort past experiences.
  • They keep their rage behavior very well hidden from everyone other than the victim of their rages. To others, they often seem amazingly engaging and friendly.
  • Some believe that Borderlines, when very young, never integrated the "good" and the "bad" mother into one person. Thus, as adults, they "split you black or white".
  • Sometimes Borderlines, as children, were not allowed to express any anger by a parent.

    • Borderline rages are nothing like partners fighting. Borderline rages are not fights, they are attacks without any mercy or empathy. Their purpose is to hurt the other as much as humanly possible, usually verbally, sometimes physically. The rages alternate with periods where the Borderline is your best friend and lover, seeing deeply into your soul, and seeming to not even remember the rages.

    If you think you have a Borderline in your life, there is help and support for you.

  • One resource is the wonderful book "Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder" By Randi Kreger and Paul Mason.
  • Another resource is www.bpdcentral.com, a support website for people who have or have had a Borderline in their life.
  • Yet another resource is M. Scott Peck's book "People of The Lie - The Hope for Healing Human Evil".

    • Yes, it is amazing and life changing to realize that split personalities really exist, and can blend such good and such evil. If you feel that your partner is sometimes an angelic soul mate, and at other times is extremely emotionally abusive, check out the resources mentioned here or contact me.